Friday, March 20, 2020

गल्ती

भर्खरै भर्ना भएको नयाँ विद्यालय
कक्षा आठको तेश्रो दिन
तेश्रो पिरियडको सुरू हुनुभन्दा दुई मिनेट अघि
जब अन्तिम बेन्चतिर फर्कियो तिम्रो मुहार
ठीक त्यसैबेला सुरू भएको हो
हाम्रा आँखाहरूको मौन संवाद
जो अविछिन्न चलिरह्यो
त्यसपछिका कम्तिमा आधा दशक 

सम्झिल्याउँदा जिन्दगीमा
ऊबेलादेखि आजसम्म अनेक गल्तीहरू गरियो
सरले पढाइरहँदा तिमीले आँखा झिम्क्यायौ
आफुले पनि झिम्काइयो
कस्सम कान्छी,
तिम्रै सम्झनामा कति रात अनिदो बिताइयो
तिमीले दिनदिनै ल्याइदिने डेरीमिल्क,
सरले सोध्दा खुसुक्क उत्तर सिकाइदिने बानी,
जन्मदिनको चकलेट,
साइन्सको भाइभा,
कत्ति कत्ति... नराखौं यी गल्तीहरूको हिसाब
टाँस्दा टाँस्दै स्कुलको भित्तेपत्रिका
पत्तै भएन कहिले टाँसियो तिमीसँग म

कम्पासले कोरेर बेन्चमाथी लेखिएका
तिम्रा र मेरा नामका सुरुवाती अक्षरहरू,
सुसेली हालेर एकअर्कालाई जिस्काइरहने साथी,
कक्षाबीच कुरा गर्दा केरिने नोटबुकका अन्तिम पन्नाहरू,
खो-खो र कबड्डीको खेल
सँगैसँगै घर फर्किने दोबाटो,
यी सबै मेरा गल्तीका मौन दर्शकहरू हुन् 

फर्काउन मिल्थ्यो भने समय
कसैगरी उल्टोतिर
र दोहोर्याउन मिल्थ्यो भने कुनै पल जिन्दगीमा,
कस्सम कान्छी, म हरेकपल्ट
जीवनकै सबैभन्दा स्वर्णिम गल्ती,
तिमीसंग पहिलोपटक आँखा जुधेको पल दोहिर्याउने थिएँ 
किनकी -
सही-सलामत रहुन्जेलसम्म यो दृष्टी
यी आँखाहरू कहिल्यै अघाउन्नन् तिमीलाई हेरेर

Tuesday, February 14, 2017

I stopped writing letters


I'd listen for you
in the hum of humming bird
and look around, in every star
in every nook and crevice
in every sunset and every sunrise!







I stopped writing letters
The doctor says
Blood cells in my body are depleting
How shall he know,
The heart ain’t a mere pump
Beating, thumping, trickling ….

Oh inapt,
How shall thou determine ailment
by sensing the pulsation?
But ought you dive to depths of heart
And listen intently
to discover ‘faults’ in the story

Is it de rigueur to exhaust blood?
I squandered, till today
Blood-ink that the deity gave
At times, together with her,
Largely- much before time
And, what remains now is
All for her to use this pump
I stopped writing letters
As no one’s left to read them now
Left are ones, who check grammar between lines
Left are ones who check nerves, not emotions anyway

I stopped writing letters
My doctor says: the blood has run out
How shall he know-
The triumph, whatever, too is ailing now

And maybe…
Maybe he knows, my heart is a mere pump now.

I stopped writing letters [to her]

Saturday, October 22, 2016

लुकामारी

Shall thou be my doctor,
I'll be a patient 24X7 

अरे
म त आधामात्रै पो हुँ
अन्तै कतै छोडीआएको छु आफ्नो आधा स्वरुप

आधा हुनु भनेको अपुरो हुनु होइन
आधा हुँदैमा एक्लो, अधुरो भन्नु पनि हुँदैन
हँसियाजस्तै घुमेको आधा चन्द्रमा
पुरै गोलोभन्दा पनि राम्रो देखिन्छ
जसरी राम्रो देखिन्छ
अलिकति ओठ खुल्दा देखिने
उनको आधा मुस्कान

उनी पनि त आधा छिन्
म पनि त आधा छु
तर आधा-आधा नै भएर सही
फरक फरक गोलार्धमा रहेरै सही
हामीबीच यौटा पुल छ समानताको
उनी मलाई पूरा गर्छिन, म उनलाई पूरा गर्छु

उनी डाक्टरी पढ्दैछिन्,
म रोग जम्मा गरिरहेछु 

Monday, October 3, 2016

दस्सैं


हजुर,
म यो दशको आन्तरिक पर्यटक

हरेक साल दशैं लागेपछि
राजधानी छोड्छु,
कोचिएर थोत्रो मिनीबसभित्र
उक्लन्छु पहाड र पुग्छु गाउँ -
उही धुलाम्मे बाटाहरू
जहाँ दौडदादौडदै
मेरै पछि छुटेको थियो मेरो बाल्यकाल
त्यही भूगोल जहाँ
बयर र ऐंसेलुका घारीभारी अनगिन्ती दौंतरीहरू छोडेर
गुराँसका डालीहरूमा  एक अन्जुली मुस्कान छोडेर
बर्षौंपहिले हिंडेको थिएँ शहर
सपना सिंगार्न

हजुर,
म यो दशको आन्तरिक पर्यटक
हरेक बर्ष दशैँ लागेपछि उसैगरी सुरु हुन्छ
र दशैं सकिएपछि उसैगरी सकिन्छ
मेरो वार्षिक भ्रमण शृंखला                                        
                                       (September 27)

Sunday, July 31, 2016

An Ode to my Love

Would I resurface,
and see the sun again?
My muse smiles her crooked smile!

Sometimes, I wonder
You and I
If we meet someday
How will we calm
our shy heartbeats?
I think we'll just pass poems
written on napkins to each other..
Steal a few shy glances,
Sip the now-turned-cold coffee,
And walk away
Reminiscing the paths we didn’t take
While we could...

Back home -
You’ll write a poem
On some random page of diary
That I gifted you
on your twentieth birthday
Packed without the red rose and a love letter
that I so, so much wanted to keep
(Though, never did so, someway)
About how we ended up being mere footnotes
While we could have made a whole history
And slowly, silently close the diary-
your own heart crushed between pages
Where you just left the pen as bookmark!

And back home-
With a broad smile on my face
I'll write a story of how 
I met an immaculate girl on one of my high school grades
And how our eyes talked for the first time,
The first time I saw your teeth
behind bars of those imperfectly-curled lips
The sharing of glitzy smile
Those extra-chocolates you gave me on your birthday,
so hurried that someone might see and tease
Times you signaled answers on my viva tests
And got yourself rebuked
Of how we were like the adjacent stars-
Everyone saw us together,
But only did we know the millions of light year separating us away
of how LIFE happened in between, and 
LOVE slipped through our unconfessed words.
I'll write the masterpiece of all my stories
The love story of two fireflies 
who never met at the crisscross to walk together

That day,
My muse shall smile your crooked smile!

Friday, June 10, 2016

Consolation

I feel you bruh, I feel you :)
Sometimes,
Nation fails, economies fall
Prodigious things collapse in no time
So [darling],
It’s okay to fail
It’s okay not to be okay, sometimes

When you’re hitting lowest of your days,
And downpour of misfortune soaks the abbeys;
Sometimes -
When your ears are too small for your heart
To understand the words inside
Come to me,
For I won’t ask questions;
Instead I’ll sit besides, listen and offer you
My shoulders to rest your chin,
My chest to cry in
Cause sometimes,
It’s okay to breakdown, loose and cry
For moon won’t be lovely with no taint of scars
For were there no  night, you won’t see the stars

Sometimes,
You should lose things to gain better
Ignite your fortitude and
Keep going, going, going...
Believe me, sometimes -
Lost is a beautiful place to find yourself!

 
 May 4, 2016